The military, regardless of branch, is its own lifestyle. It's a lifestyle, though it has many wonderful aspects, that is not for everyone. It is full of uncertainty, long distances, separation from loved ones, and moves. Oh, the moves. There are three little letters that my husband can say that have the power to make me cry...or make me scream with joy. P. C. S. But, if you aren't in the lifestyle (and let's be real, even if you are), you might not know what PCS means.
Total honesty here, I just had to Google what PCS stands for. Then I had to add the phrase 'with the military' to my search because, apparently, there are different phrases that PCS stands for - the things you learn every day. Anyway, I know what PCS means, but I couldn't tell you what the individual letters meant (my husband would be rolling his eyes if he were here because we've been dealing with them for...what, 13 years now?) And it's not like the military has dozens upon dozens of acronyms that I've had to learn over the years in order to understand half of what my husband is saying when he comes home, right? (which would be my response to the eye roll)...so I'm giving myself a pass. Plus, I know PCS means we move...do I really need to know the actual words?
Anyway, PCS stands for 'Permanent Change of Station.' The word 'Permanent' makes me chuckle because, really, 2-3 years before new orders come in is the opposite of what permanent means. I've decided to re-name this acronym, as I may with others in the future to lend some humor to the stress that is married to the adventure of this lifestyle. What it now stands for is: 'Pack, Change, Shove.' Why these exact words? Glad you asked...
1) You have to 'Pack' ALL of your belongings. That, or you have movers do the packing for you. Either way, all of your belongings need to be packed, wrapped, stuffed, boxed, rolled, and either put in storage or loaded on to a moving truck, by you or a company, to be taken to a new home that is usually still TBD (yes, that means 'to be determined' and yes, it means that sometimes you have to move to a new duty station and you don't have a place to actually move in to when you get there). Moving your things yourself, or partially yourself, will ensure that those items will remain unbroken when you arrive at your new destination (if they aren't stolen along your route, but that's another rabbit hole we don't want to go down). But the burden still falls on you to do the packing and the hauling. Choosing a moving company eliminates the labor, but increases the possibility, and let's face it, the probability, that your household goods will not arrive in the same condition they left in...if they arrive at all. It's a coin toss.
2) Once said homey things are packed, then you need to 'Change.' Change what you might ask? Everything. Yes, everything. You aren't just moving to a new street or a new town where some of your constants, like that hair dresser you finally found to do what you love to your hair, or the coffee shop that you absolutely love to go to after church on Sunday, are a little further but still within a drivable distance. You aren't able to consider that your kids are in school, and you'd love for them to graduate with the friends that they've made.
No...you must change everything. Doctors, schools, credit card information, tv and internet providers, insurances, licenses, hair dressers, favorite food locals, neighbors, friends, jobs and literally anything that has your address on it.
But that's not all. You also need to change the stuff you have for your home. Why? Why would you change the stuff you just had packed and moved? Well, because the furniture that you bought to fit the spaces of your old home? Those spaces aren't the same in your new home. It's a different layout. Where last year we had one story, this year we have two. Twice as many windows...not enough curtains. The curtains we do have, only went to a room that had two windows. Now there are more windows to cover and I can't remember where I bought them last time so I need to either have mismatched curtains, no curtains, or buy new curtains that all match. The same goes for furniture, inside and out. This kitchen is much smaller....so I'll get rid of lots of things that I'd rather keep but, where would I store them with half the cabinets I had in my old home? So, out it goes. Change is in the air and it touches everything. Masks will not help you here.
3) With all of this change floating around, we find ourselves forced to 'Shove.' Shove the furniture that you do have into the new house, with its different layout, and the second floor with its extra windows. You shove because you have to. You don't have time to plan. You just spent an untold number of days in travel, maybe some in a hotel or series of hotels along the way, and you have kids. You have pets. You have the need for normalcy again. So, when the movers come, they unload from the truck and just dump it for you. Some will have the movers unpack everything, but for me, that creates more chaos. I'd rather have boxes stacked neatly that I can unpack one at a time, than all of my belongings just out and everywhere. Everyone handles the unload different. But, once the movers leave, I start shoving. Not haphazardly, because I want my house to look nice and I want to enjoy my space, but I no longer need a house, now I need a home.
I need for my children to feel as comfortable as they can in this new place, with these new neighbors, where everything they see, hear, touch...it's all NEW. And new, while exciting, also means different. I want them to have the familiar...as much for comfort as for safety that in a world with so much change, some things are constant. So, I shove everything into the places I find for their beds, their toys, their special things. I make a box fort for fun so they don't get overwhelmed that our stuff is still in those boxes. All while I shove our world, that I finally got to fit so nicely into our old house (after a year or two), into this new house where I have to start all over. By the time this house is 100% the way I want it, I fully expect my husband to walk through the door with our next PCS orders in hand.
Yes, the military is a lifestyle all its own. It has ups, it has downs, it has perks, it has drawbacks. I learned very early on in this Marine Corps life that in addition to Semper Fi (always faithful), marines, their spouses, and their families also needed to follow the phrase, Semper Gumby (always flexible). It doesn't matter that I don't know the exact words of what an acronym is in this lifestyle, as long as I know how to handle that acronym when my husband comes home with it. And personally, I prefer "Pack, Change, Shove" to the plain old meaning behind PCS.
If you have a phrase you usually replace for the acronyms that fill our lives, please comment and let me know how you enjoy, handle, and get through this wonderful military life.
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